Seriously, how lazy can you get?

I mean, c'mon, pancakes from a spray can? Somehow I can't see people chugging this like whipped cream.

Will you marry me?

Tomorrow will be my 12th wedding anniversary, so you'll forgive me for the somewhat maudlin post. That's a long time to spend with someone these days. Our marriage is almost a teenager! So in honor of this auspicious occasion, I'd like to entertain you with a little story.



Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl. Their paths crossed when they were in the 6th grade. By the time high school rolled around, they were fast friends. Throughout high school, the boy would call the girl his best friend. Girls, of course, had multiple best friends, each ranked through the secret female algorithm of friendship, resulting in best friends, best-best friends, bff's, etc. But she secretly thought of the boy as her best friend, too.

During their senior year, something in their friendship changed. The realization that high school was ending and that the girl was moving away to go to college cause the normally stoic boy to begin to think. And the thoughts he had were of companionship, friendship, loneliness, desire...and love. He realized that he loved the girl. These thoughts overrode his normal anxieties and fears and the boy kissed the girl. And confessed his love for her. The girl was overwhelmed and gladly returned his love, telling the boy that she had loved him for years but had abandoned any hope that the boy would return her feelings.

So the girl went away to college. As the poets say, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and their love for each other continued to grow. On a cold December evening, as the girl was back home visiting the boy, they went on a date. Nothing fancy; they strolled around downtown. The boy bought the girl a rose from a street vendor. And he led her to the park on the shores of the lake in the center of town. In this park was an outdoor amphitheater, annually a host to a Shakespeare festival, now silent, its stage bare. But it was a lovely place where one could walk through and sit in the audience seats under the stars and enjoy the feelings of being in a theater. This was something they both could appreciate, the girl being a theater major, the boy a former theater tech geek.

The boy took the girls hand and led the girl to the stairs leading from the audience to the bare stage. He guided her up onto the stage, right to the middle, the soft ambient lighting of the park making it feel like they were in a nighttime scene in a Shakespeare play. The boy got down on one knee and asked the girl to marry him.



As you have probably guessed, the boy was me. The girl was the Goddess. She accepted my proposal and, four years later, we were married. And 16 years later, we can still tell this story to each other and it still generates those little flurries in our tummies reminiscent of those heady days full of new love and the prospect of the coming adventure of a life lived together. An adventure that goes on to this day.

I love you, little darlin'. And I'm extremely happy that you agreed to share your life with me.

The brilliance of the WorldNutDaily is truly astounding

OMFSM! The WorldNutDaily has outdone themselves. They have reached new heights (or depths, depending on your perspective) of mind-numbing stupidity. In an effort to save their readers from enduring the intellectual trauma of actually trying to form a coherent and reasonable thought, they are now offering for sale the complete collection of "Politically Incorrect Guides". This collection contains such shining gems as "The Politically Incorrect Guide to the South (and Why It Will Rise Again)" and "The Politically Incorrect Guide to Darwinism and Intelligent Design".

Not content with just spewing garbage in the form of mindless articles written by the likes of such flaming brilliances as Chuck Norris, they are now providing you with the opportunity to "browse through all the politically incorrect guides in one place online and satisfy your intellectual curiosity quickly and efficiently."

Don't miss out on this fabulous opportunity! There's a "Politically Incorrect Guide" out there no matter what your particular prejudice or paranoia may be. Peruse the selections and check out books illuminating the truth behind such controversial subjects as:

• Women, sex and feminism
  
  
• Science
  
  
• Hunting
  
  
• Capitalism
  
  
• Islam and the Crusades
  
  
• American history
  
  
• The Bible
  
  
• Western Civilization

"The politically incorrect guides were a very smart idea and executed brilliantly," said Joseph Farah, founder and editor of WND. "I wish it had been my idea. Now we're making it easier than ever to take advantage of all the wisdom and insight found in these books." [emphasis mine]

Let that sink in for just a moment. Then join with me in a rousing chorus of "WHAT THE FUCK?!?"

Reduce to Common Sense: Carnival of the Godless 109

The latest edition of the Carnival of the Godless is out. Go peruse and enjoy: Reduce to Common Sense: Carnival of the Godless 109

Link: http://cyberlizardscollection.blogspot.com/2009/01/carnival-of-godless-109.html

Pulling a gun in my neighborhood is seriously un-fucking cool

So I was cleaning out my garage this evening. Got a late start, so around 8pm I've got half the garaged emptied onto the driveway and am organizing my gardening equipment. The usual sounds of the neighborhood float on the air: kids playing basketball in the street, the hum of a distant lawn mower, the laughter and conversation of the families down the street congregating in their yard. Just a nice, quiet evening in suburbia.

Now, my house is on the corner of a T intersection, so out of my open garage I can see down the street that mine buts into. Three houses down, there is a crowd in front of a house. This, in and of itself, is not unusual. There are usually several people out there, playing basketball, shooting the breeze, just hanging out. But something has happened to rile them up. I can hear angry shouts, then car tires squealing. Standing in the open garage door, I watch several people jump into cars and take off. Some others go running off up the road, out of my sight.

I turn back into the garage, continuing my efforts, when I hear a blood-curdling scream. This sound literally made my blood run cold. Definitely not something minor. Looking back out I can see several women running back to their house, screaming, "HE'S GOT A GUN, HE'S GOT A GUN!" I immediately head into the house, where my wife is getting the kids ready for bed. Explaining what I heard and saw, I hustle them into the bedroom at the back of the house, farthest from the front that I can get them. Crouching low, I head back to the inside door to the garage and peek out. Down the street, all is chaos.

Pulling out the cell, I fire off a call to 911, explaining what I've heard and seen. The operator tells me that they've already had several calls about the incident and assures me that the police are on the way. I cautiously edge my way out into the garage, to try to figure out if the coast is clear. By this time, things have calmed down to some extent. I can hear a woman on her phone; I got the impression she was talking to 911. Within minutes the police arrive. Several of the men are shouting angrily to the police, who are trying to ascertain what happened and who was involved. Eventually, things settle down. I overhear the police telling my neighbors that they've been having trouble with this group recently.

This is only the second time in my life that I have been truly frightened for my families safety. The first time was when I was standing in the Florida Mall, holding my sleeping daughter while my son slept in the stroller beside me. We were waiting for the Goddess to finish her shopping when a person got stabbed right in front of me, staggering away leaving a trail of blood on the shiny mall floor. Now this happens right in my own front yard.

Fortunately, in this case, there were no injuries, no shots had been fired. But I think that I'll keep the kids inside for the next couple of days.

Super Mario Bros. Madness!

My 6 year old is very interested in Super Mario Bros. He's played all the old-school games, and the new ones. He has toys, a crocheted doll, pajamas, shirts... let's just say he has a bunch of Mario stuff. But what he wanted most for christmas was Mario Legos. So "Santa" complied.


Check out my Flickr photostream for more.

Link: http://flickr.com/photos/cyberlizard/

The Forefathers

If you're in the central Florida area, a fantastic band is performing this weekend in Orlando. The Forefathers is a really cool world music fusion band. They were voted "Best Acoustic Act" in 2007 by the Orlando Weekly and they are featured on National Public Radio's Echoes program hosted by John Diliberto. I'm proud to say that I personally know two of the members and they're great guys. I would strongly suggest checking them out if you get the chance.

Sunday, January 25th, 2009

Bikes Beans & Bordeaux

Tour de Cure American Diabetes Association Fundraiser
Brunch and Wine Tasting @ 11:00 AM

www.bikesbeansandbordeaux.com

3022 Corrine Drive
Orlando, FL 32803

The Forefathers will perform from 11:00am-1:00pm

www.theforefathers.com
www.myspace.com/TheForefathers

Link: http://www.theforefathers.com/

Close your eyes, bow your heads. Let us nag...

Jon Stewart always has terrific insights on the latest goings-on. He picked up on something I too noticed while watching the festivities the other day: how many times does their god need to be bothered just because we're inaugurating a new president? I mean, c'mon: before, during, after, and then again the next day? If my kids nagged me as much as these people bother their god, there would be some good old fashioned smiting going on, I can tell you that. I don't suck up to my boss anywhere near as much, and he actually does things that affect me, like give me raises and shit. I can't quite comprehend why one would suck up to such a non-responsive entity.

Anyway, I'll let Jon tell you about it.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Changefest '09 - Dance Dance Inauguration

Barack Obama Interview
John McCain Interview

Sarah Palin Video
Funny Election Video

Playing with toys

Not those kind of toys, you sick perverts! Geeze, I try to do something serious and all you people do is make juvenile double entendres. I'm talking about cool web tools (huh-huh-huh, you said "tool").

Let's start over. I stumbled upon this cool tool gadget that takes a feed from a blog and generates a word cloud based on the frequency of the words found. So I did it for this blog (yes, I know I said "did it", *sigh*).

Forget it. Just look at the picture.

Link: http://www.wordle.net/gallery/wrdl/457284/CyberLizard%27s_Collection

Well come, President Obama

This is the first time that I have listened to an inaugural address. As my good friend who listened to it with me said, this is the first time I've wanted to. I am a longtime snarky cynic, yet even my snark failed listening to our President speak. And for the first time that I can recall, I can use that phrase, "our President", "my President" without flinching, without the internal sneer of disgust at what "my country" was doing in the world, at what it stood for. I actually feel proud to call myself an American. I was proud to hear my President speak, to nod along with him, even to disagree with portions of it, because I knew that my views would be respected not rejected. I was proud to sit next to my friend, a recently naturalized citizen of the United States; proud that someone would choose to join the country that I was so fortunately born into through no effort of my own.

This is starting to get really sappy, I know. Don't worry, I'm sure it won't last. President Obama is only human and will certainly do something to piss me off in the near future, and I'll be here ranting about it. But it will finally be with a sense that my ranting actually means something, that it can actually have an impact. Even though the political process isn't perfect, even though it will fail to address all of our concerns, it is our process and by taking ownership of it we have collectively elected someone who has vowed to carry us forward in a new era of change and true tolerance, not just the lip-service that politicians have given to their responsibilities to the people in the past.

Here's to hoping it lasts.

Of Politics and Teeth Pulling

2009/01/20 - Inauguration Day!

Barack Hussein Obama, the United States' first African-American president, will be sworn in today. Even more symbolic is that the event takes place the day after the annual celebration of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. But you probably already knew all that. You'd have to be living under a rock to have missed that news. It is an historic event (yes, I prefer "an historic" to "a historic". Deal with it). The loonies on the right are chanting "anti-Christ!" while the loonies on the left are celebrating it like the second coming of Jesus, minus all the Revelation drama of course. The rest of us are holding our breath until noon, when we can exhale the enormous sigh of relief we've been suppressing since November. Ding dong, the Bush is gone... The old administration passes away and the new takes control in the 44th peaceful transfer of power since the founding of this country. That fact alone is worthy of celebration, considering what other parts of the world have to go through/have gone through when control of the government of their countries change. The fact that we can peacefully transition from a government based on secrecy, lies, false pretenses, anti-intellectualism, religious encroachment and abuses of civil liberties in the name of protection, to one of (potentially, hopefully) respect, intelligence, integrity, science, common sense and the promotion of true civil rights both home and abroad; that fact is especially praise-worthy.

And yet, even in the face of these momentous events, life goes on. The cascade of tiny events that make up most of our days collect into the foundations of our lives, preempting even the celebratory atmosphere of these historic days. Children must be fed, beds made, laundry done and the bacteria that eat away at our teeth don't recognise holidays. My Turkey, only six years old, had to have a tooth extracted yesterday. The sobbing of a child, wracked with pain, and their accusations, uttered from around a mouthful of bloody gauze, of "I trusted you! You said it wouldn't be bad!" are enough to drown out the cheers and celebrations, no matter the historic importance of the day.

Fortunately, the pain subsided, then disappeared; the accusations were forgotten and my Turkey hugged me and thanked me for taking care of him. And now we can start to focus on the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity of witnessing a member of one of the most oppressed and discouraged populations of this country rise above rampant racism and prejudice and be sworn in as President of the United States of America, sweeping into office with an unprecedented 80+% approval rating by those he is to govern.

January 2009 will be remembered both for its historic inauguration and (at least in my family) for the extraction of the offending tooth.

What the fuck is wrong with South Carolina?

See what I just did there in the title of this post? I just committed a felony, at least I did in South Carolina. Their state legislature passed a law that makes it a felony to "wilfully and knowingly to publish orally or in writing, exhibit, or otherwise make available material containing words, language, or actions of a profane, vulgar, lewd, lascivious, or indecent nature."

At least, it will be a felony if the governor signs the bill. All I can say is, what the fuck were these cocksuckers thinking? I've been in jail once for something so stupid as to not be worth mentioning. This is something I'd go to jail happily for. And it's a felony so I'd be in jail for up to 5 years rather than 5 hours like I was before.

Rock on, South Carolina! Way to improve that reputation for being an ass-backward redneck armpit! Good on ya, Senator Robert Ford, for sponsoring such brilliant legislation to clean up the state.

Hat tip: Pharyngula

[Edit: apparently this bill has just been introduced and is in committee; in other words it still has yet to be voted on. Still, this idiot has submitted it before in 2003 and in 2006. I don't care if he also submitted a bill to make same-sex civil unions legal, he's still a stupid fuck who's trying to pass laws that violate the First Amendment.]

You talkin' to me?

Nation, there is only one person that God should be speaking through and that is our good friend Stephen Colbert at The Colbert Report. And he reveals his connection to the almighty in his segment Yahweh or No Way. Enjoy the revelations of the Lord.

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Yahweh or No Way - Roland Burris

Colbert at Christmas
Colbert Christmas DVD

Green Screen
Bill O'Reilly Interview

Link: http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/215452/january-08-2009/yahweh-or-no-way---roland-burris

Blow your mind, one cent at a time

Have you ever tried to visualize the really big numbers that are being thrown around during the financial crisis? Most of us have seen $100. How about $1,000? Now try working with millions and billions. If you're feeling a bit lost in the abstract, take a look at The MegaPenny Project. Now. Go look at it now. Keep clicking.

Hat tip: Phil Plait over at Bad Astronomy

Link: http://www.kokogiak.com/megapenny/default.asp

Does anyone really think Scientology is a religion anymore?

I'll never understand how Scientology is still under the protective aura of the classification Religion. I mean, c'mon, it's a cult founded by a science fiction writer claiming that we're all infected with invisible alien beings killed by Xenu on Earth millions of years ago. L. Ron Hubbard actually wrote to friends describing how he'd like to start a religion to make money. Then he goes and does it and it's taken seriously?

That's why I'm surprised when I see governmental entities like Riverside County, California passing laws designed to restrict protests against cults like the Scientologists.

And lest you think I'm making this stuff up about them (and just to really piss off the Scientologists) here is a link to actual documents from their so-called church talking about their whackaloon ideas.

Link: http://www.latimes.com/news/printedition/california/la-me-scientology10-pg,0,349984.story

What better target for conversion than sick Jews?

My step-father-in-law (let's call him Joe) was in the hospital recently; nasty bacterial pneumonia entirely obstructing his left lung, fun stuff. After he had been moved from ICU into a room, he was paid a visit. A friendly nurse came in to have a little chat. Nothing surprising about that. Nurses, doctors, interns had been coming in and out the whole time. This is the hospital, remember. There's always a vein to be stuck or a temperature to be taken or a nasal cannula to be checked (I just like saying cannula, hee hee).

Anyway, this nurse had a different assignment. Probably the most important task in the whole hospital. He was tasked by the Lord to talk to Joe about his spiritual salvation.

I should probably make it clear at this point that Joe is Jewish. Has been his whole life, on account of his mother being Jewish and all. He's 65 years old. I'm thinking that over the course of those 65 years, he's probably heard about this new-fangled thing called Christianity once or twice. Probably heard about it, maybe even thought about it, and decided to stick with what he knew. And it's been my experience that for Jews, it's more than just a religion, it's a cultural identity. I've known atheists who still identify as Jewish. Anyway, the point is, he's heard about this dude named Jesus before. But for some reason, this nurse decided that a 65 year old Jew tethered to an oxygen tank with pneumonia in the hospital was the perfect choice to share the love of Christ with.

Hearing that Joe was a Jew and had his own spiritual beliefs, one might assume that the nurse would politely excuse himself. I mean, that would be polite and respectful of others beliefs. But that assumption would be wrong. After all, we're talking about a man's eternal soul! The nurse couldn't be expected to leave that poor soul wallowing in the body of a Jew, of all things! So he stayed with Joe for around an hour, explaining to him about the love of Jesus and exactly why Joe was wrong for being a Jew and how he would end up in Hell if he didn't accept the love Jesus.

Knowing Joe the way I do, I'm actually quite surprised that he didn't just tell the nurse to get the fuck out and shove his Jesus up his ass on the way out. He can be quite animated that way. I can only assume that the illness, the lack of oxygen and the authority over a patient that an individual in scrubs in the hospital has over a patient combined to overwhelm his normally acerbic nature and allow this fool to keep prattling on.

Another interesting aspect to this whole situation is who owns the hospital. According to their website "Florida Hospital ... is owned and operated by Adventist Health System, a part of the worldwide organization of the Seventh-day Adventist Church." Ahhhhh. Now this encounter begins to take on a different tone. I've always been aware that Florida Hospital was run by the church. Aside from the occasional picture of Jesus in the hallway, there never was any overt proselytizing going on that I could see. As far as I could tell, they were satisfied to simply provide good medical care to the community (and make some money on the side, too, nothing wrong with that). Apparently one has to be a patient to receive the full treatment. Only if you're sick in a hospital bed do you get to be shown the light of Christ. Who better than to receive the Good News than those vulnerable souls in a frightening place with a possibly life-threatening illness? It's not taking advantage of people, it's saving them, right? Fuck that.

By cornering a patient, wearing the uniform of the hospital, acting as a representative of that medical organization, and giving that patient the full-court press even after they've informed you that they aren't interested, you are saying that you are following the hospital's policies and that conversion is one of them. It sickens me that an organization would use it's power over a vulnerable population to shove its own beliefs down their throats.

It's actually kind of sad that these bible-thumpers are so insecure of their own faith and ideas that they feel the need to prey on the weak and vulnerable to get conversions rather than relying on the truth and accuracy of their own position to convince people. Sad, but still completely unacceptable.

108th Carnival of the Godless: New Years Edition

Here it is, a brand new revolution of the Earth around our star and a brand new edition of the Carnival of the Godless. For a lot of people, the new year represents a new beginning; a time to reminisce about the year past and ruminate on the next year before us. I, myself, am not immune to this and have been pondering what I can do to make this tiny mudball flying through space a better place during its next pass around Sol. One thing that I became acutely aware of in 2008 is the continued need for atheists to make our collective voices heard and ensure that our rights aren't trampled under the feet (or attempted legislation) of the religious-right in their attempts to implement a theocracy in the name of democracy.

So here are some of your godless voices, crying out in the wilderness, trying to make the world a better place for you and me (did that sound too sappy? I thought it sounded sappy).

Following in that vein, Mark has an admonition for us all in the new year: It?s 2009...Get Real! posted at Proud Atheists.

Christmas Remembrances

Another Christmas has passed, apparently surviving the war that we atheists have waged upon it. In the aftermath of the latest skirmish, it's a good time to reminisce on the good times and the true meaning of Christmas.

larryniven presents The Christmas follies posted at Rust Belt Philosophy, saying, "I guess it's a bit late, but here's some interesting claims about Christmas, made by the kind of Christians we typically pick fights with."

Ponzo Simonetz presents ponzo reads the bible - war on christmas special posted at Open Threat, saying, "I suppose I shouldn't have waited until Dec. 25 for this post, since everyone stops paying attention on Dec. 26. Regardless, I decided to do a "War on Christmas" entry in my "Ponzo Reads the Bible" series, in which I try to tie together the long tradition of winter solstice celebrations, what the Bible has to say (or not) on the matter, and the perennial right-wing tradition of complaining about it. I think it came off well. Maybe a bit late for Jan. 11, but you might think it worthy of notice."

Why sure, Ponzo, I find it worthy of notice. I'm glad that someone is reading the bible, 'cause way too many people out there haven't, yet proclaim to be supporting "biblical" principles.

Newbie Atheist presents The True Meaning Of Christ-mass posted at Last Trumpet Ministries, saying, "(Since it's not actually a "blog", this may not be appropriate for the carnival but have a look)

The True Meaning Of Christ-Mass

This is a bit late, but this post on an Evangelical Christian site is the most scathing attack on Christmas I've ever read. Bill O'Reilly should worry about these guys."

There's a lot of things that Bill-O needs to worry about.

Where religion has gone wrong

You know it; I know it. Religion has some serious flaws. Discussing those flaws, pointing out the inherent inaccuracies, contradictions and general delusions built into the very fabric of religion is a critical part of our godless journey. The following posts point out a number of the problem areas within and around religion.

Magdalune brings us A Child-Like Faith posted at Sowing Seeds in Winter. "Magdalune criticizes the assumption that a biblically-supported "child-like faith" should be the ideal."

I like this next guy; nice and subtle. Kinda reminds me of me!

No More Mr. Nice Guy! presents The pope is a dope - NMMNG posted at No More Mr. Nice Guy!, saying, "The Vatican continues to show what a clueless, cobwebbed anachronism it is."

vjack always has insightful things to say, as exemplified by his responses to Common Absurdities Atheists Hear From Christians posted at Atheist Revolution.

James presents What Must We Do To Be Saved? | anatheist.net posted at AnAtheist.Net, saying, "This post, written by a friend of mine, I feel is well researched, written in an engaging style, and most importantly, gets right to the heart of a major problem with Christianity."

Barry Leiba presents One nation, under...? posted at Staring At Empty Pages

Ajita Kamal presents Nirmukta Exclusive: Interview with Daniel Dennett. posted at Nirmukta, saying, "I had the chance to interview the great Daniel Dennett, author of Breaking the Spell, Religion as a Natural Phenomenon."

Atheist Optimism

That we atheists have hope and optimism often comes as a surprise to those unfamiliar with atheism in general. But godlessness ≠ hopelessness. Here are a couple of entries showing the more positive face of atheism.

Mike White presents A Humanistic Outlook posted at Life According to Mike White.

Tree Dreamer presents Beautiful Atheism posted at Tree Dreamer.

I really went back and forth about whether to include this next post. The guidelines for the carnival clearly state "The post you send in must be from a godless perspective..." and this post doesn't quite come from the godless perspective. But then I figured that, since they went to all the trouble to submit it and bring it to our collective attention, we should read the post and let our love flow freely.

Ariel Bravy presents Spiritual Truth is Experiential, Not a Belief System | You Are Truly Loved posted at You Are Truly Loved.

Take a stab at it. Just because we're godless doesn't mean we can't have a little fun. And don't forget to do the thymus thump while you're at it!

Current Events

Many events occur that are of direct interest to the godless community. Part of our job is to make sure that our opinions are known. Even if we don't all agree, having a discussion about what's going on in the world is invaluable.

Steve Snyder/SocraticGadfly presents Atheists sue over 'so help me God' - misinformed on Constitution posted at SocraticGadfly, saying, "My skeptical atheist's take on Newdow/FFRF suing to stop the inaugural oath, invocation, etc."

Michael Meadon presents God & Africa posted at Ionian Enchantment, saying, "A piece responding to a Times article suggesting that what Africa really needs is God."

Atheist Movement

We are growing larger, louder and more obvious to the rest of the world. Talking about atheism as a movement, as a collection of individuals greater than the sum of its parts, can only be a good thing. Here are a couple of meta-discussions on atheism in general.

Greta Christina presents How Can Atheists Be Good Allies? posted at Greta Christina's Blog, saying, "A couple weeks ago, I wrote a piece about how progressive, non- atheist groups can be good allies with the atheist movement. This is the flip side: How can atheists BE good allies?"

I always enjoy Ms. Christina's writings and I especially enjoyed this series she did on atheists and allies.

Tree Dreamer presents On Befriending the Ex-Muslim posted at Tree Dreamer, saying, "Mathurine is a guest poster on my blog. I am submitting this on her behalf. The post is about atheists befriending and supporting ex-Muslims who are now agnostic and atheist."

Dissecting Belief

A large part of our job as godless bloggers is to take apart and critically analyze the belief of others (and ourselves. Introspection is good!). Sometimes that means scientifically breaking down an argument and pointing out its logical flaws. Other times it just means a good rant.

Andrew Bernardin presents A Supernatural Assumption posted at The Evolving Mind.

ben presents Church Of The Eternal Return posted at Head Wide Open.

Tom Stelene presents Prager Smears Secularism posted at The Imaginary Philosophy.

Roast Beef Vag presents Attention Monster Families!!! posted at Roast Beef Vag.

As a computer programmer by profession, this next post struck me as quite beautiful
Brian Jay Stanley presents The Atheism of Computers posted at Aphorisms and Paradoxes.

And to sum up the past year, Ron Gold presents The 2008 Invisible Pink Unicorn Awards posted at The Invisible Pink Unicorn

I hope you enjoyed this New Year's journey through the world of the godless. It has been my great pleasure to host this event and to be exposed to a number of bloggers that I hadn't read before, as well as some old favorites. Please make sure they know that their efforts are appreciated by visiting the links and leaving a comment. Even if you don't agree, commenting and discussion are vital parts of the blogosphere and your participation as a reader is critical.

Cheers!

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About damn time!

Courtesy of our friends at the Pew Forum on Religious and Public Life comes news that people who murder their children via extreme and willful neglect will be going to court on manslaughter charges. I'm not talking about a parent who leaves their kid in a locked car on a summer day or has a gun hanging around loaded for a toddler to find. I'm referring to these child abusers who decide that medical intervention is against the teachings of their church and let their children die rather than go to a doctor and take an antibiotic.

Two high-profile deaths from 2008 will land in the courts in 2009 when the Oregon justice system determines whether members of an Oregon City faith-healing church acted criminally in the deaths of two children who were denied medical treatment.

The trials, in Clackamas County Circuit Court, could lead to the first legal tests of a 1999 state law disallowing faith-healing at the expense of a child's life.

What's more, the almost-certain appeals in the cases may ask the courts to redefine the balance between freedom of religion and parents' legal responsibilities for the health and safety of minors.

The first trial, set for Jan. 26, will weigh manslaughter and criminal mistreatment charges against Carl Brent Worthington, 38, and his wife, Raylene Marie Worthington, 26, in the death of their 15-month-old daughter, Ava. The girl died last March of bronchial pneumonia and blood infections after she was denied conventional medical care.

In the second trial, set for June 23, Raylene Worthington's parents, Jeffrey Dean Beagley, 50, and his wife, Marci Rae Beagley, 47, of Oregon City will face charges of criminally negligent homicide in the death of their 16-year-old son, Neil. The boy died in June of heart failure triggered by a urinary tract blockage.

In both deaths, state medical examiners said both children could have been treated with routine medical procedures or medicine.

The common thread in both cases is the Followers of Christ Church, a fundamentalist sect that bans medical attention for congregation members, instead relying on prayer vigils and the "laying on of hands."

This disgusts me. My 2 yr old little girl recently had pneumonia. It is very scary when your child is sick and having trouble breathing. To passively sit and rely on prayer vigils and the "laying on of hands" while that child dies is completely beyond my comprehension as both a parent and a human being. I can guarantee you that if one of those parents were in my presence dying, I would do everything that I possibly could to save their life. So what does that tell you about the difference between "Christian" and atheist morals?

Getting all fired up in the new year

This kind of crap gets my blood boiling. Here is the text of what these creatards in Mississippi are trying to get put into textbooks, courtesy of House Bill 25:

The word 'theory' has many meanings, including: systematically organized knowledge; abstract reasoning; a speculative idea or plan; or a systematic statement of principles. Scientific theories are based on both observations of the natural world and assumptions about the natural world. They are always subject to change in view of new and confirmed observations.

This textbook discusses evolution, a controversial theory some scientists present as a scientific explanation for the origin of living things. No one was present when life first appeared on earth. Therefore, any statement about life's origins should be considered a theory.

Evolution refers to the unproven belief that random, undirected forces produced living things. There are many topics with unanswered questions about the origin of life which are not mentioned in your textbook, including: the sudden appearance of the major groups of animals in the fossil record (known as the Cambrian Explosion); the lack of new major groups of other living things appearing in the fossil record; the lack of transitional forms of major groups of plants and animals in the fossil record; and the complete and complex set of instructions for building a living body possessed by all living things.

Study hard and keep an open mind.

I'm all for keeping an open mind, just don't open it so much that your brain falls out. The creationists just won't quit trying to shove their mythology-based life views on the rest of us. They just love to try to twist the meanings of words and ideas to fit their narrow viewpoint. Take their explanation of theory; makes it sound all nebulous and up in the air doesn't it? However, according to the United States National Academy of Sciences,

Some scientific explanations are so well established that no new evidence is likely to alter them. The explanation becomes a scientific theory. In everyday language a theory means a hunch or speculation. Not so in science. In science, the word theory refers to a comprehensive explanation of an important feature of nature supported by facts gathered over time. Theories also allow scientists to make predictions about as yet unobserved phenomena.

A scientific theory is a well-substantiated explanation of some aspect of the natural world, based on a body of facts that have been repeatedly confirmed through observation and experiment. Such fact-supported theories are not "guesses" but reliable accounts of the real world. The theory of biological evolution is more than "just a theory." It is as factual an explanation of the universe as the atomic theory of matter or the germ theory of disease. Our understanding of gravity is still a work in progress. But the phenomenon of gravity, like evolution, is an accepted fact.

Now this is a little closer to reality than their interpretation.

If all this sounds familiar, that's because it is. They tried the same thing in Cobb County, GA and Dover, PA. They got smacked down both times. Let's work to make sure this attempt gets the attention it deserves. vjack has posted information on who to contact to make your voice heard before this kind of insanity gets pushed into law. We can't let even our backward brothers in Mississippi fall through the cracks ;-)

Link: http://www.atheistrev.com/2009/01/science-education-in-mississippi.html

Back in the saddle again

Here it is, already 8 January and you're only now hearing from me. Quite apropos for your favorite procrastination expert blogger, I suppose. It's really not my fault, though. Seriously. A combination of family vacations, virii and bacterii conspired against me, resulting in the truly appalling lack of noise from this quadrant of the universe.

When my head rose above the sea of various bodily fluids being excreted by myself and those around me, I had 1,000+ unread items in my Google Reader. Even with someone with my supreme speed reading skillz couldn't have gotten through all those posts, written about all the interesting/amazing/disgusting/horrifying crap going on and still maintained what little sanity he had left.

So I marked them all as read. I'm going to pretend the last few weeks didn't occur (except for all the really kool stuff I got to do in the snow) and start off with a clean slate; a freshly wiped mental hard disk, so to speak.

Starting tomorrow (did you expect anything else from a master procratenator?) I'll start to do some serious blogging, stuff that'll blow your mind and make you go, "wow, how come everyone on the planet isn't reading this dude's increadible stuff?". Something like that anyway.

Time is running out for the godless

At least, time is running out to make your submissions for the 108th Carnival of the Godless! Get those submissions in by Friday so that I can spend Saturday compiling all your entries into what will be the most amazing COTG yet!